Sunday, June 24, 2012
Day 7-Back Chat: Irritation
When I am irritated with someone, I run all kinds of back chat in my mind. It varies- anything from what I want to tell this person, how I would phrase it, what this person did wrong to upset me and as the thoughts keep running there is no action taken to direct myself to how to handle the situation in common sense with discussion, but rather I charge myself with angry feelings and possible outcomes of my back chat.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to create a multi-conversation (back chat) in my head when I get irritated with a person-thus it is as if I am talking behind the person's back without addressing anything of substance to direct the situation I am irritated about.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to listen to the multi-conversation (back chat) coming from different inner personalities that "tell" me what I should say in a nice/bad/mad/sad way instead of facing the person face to face and discussing the situation that upsets me.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to to charge myself with anger to the point where my head starts to hurt and I upset myself so much I become angry at everyone else-not considering that everyone else had nothing to do with why I am upset and disregarding to self check and investigate at the core reason I am upset on the first place.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to place the blame for my irritation on the other person without even telling them that I am upset at them-hiding it within me and suppressing the emotion rather than explore it to the core and address it face to face within a discussion.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to NOT realize that back chat is a emotional reaction that avoids having to face the person face to face in within this creating an alternate mind reality of how I want the situation to turn out.
I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to NOT, when becoming irritated, to simply breathe, NOT allow myself to get irritated and within that being able to address the situation in a common sense manner with clarity, NO emotional charge to take control over me and cause me to react within myself creating the back chat.
I commit myself to no longer allow myself to exist in back chat conversations but rather address the situation accordingly.
I commit myself to when an irritation towards arises within me to first investigate why I got irritated (in self reflection) and then direct myself to addressing it face to face without emotionally reacting within me or the other person.
I commit myself to breathing as a self assistance and self correction if I happen to enter the stage of irritation.