This is part of the series “Living Words"
I've been looking at the word “intimacy” on my list of words for some time now and I was not sure how to approach it. The typical understanding of intimacy is being close to someone by being intimate on a sexual level- at least that is how I've viewed intimacy.
The other day for the first time a true opportunity opened up. I had the chance to sit down with my husband and we had a point of opening up about something that he is experiencing. In the past I tried to force this point of sharing on him and I was rejected and as a result I suppressed that point out within myself. After learning about not forcing/pressuring/expecting, I saw the opportunity and I decided that I will try to open the point with him if he was willing to open up, and he did- which is cool because that is something in a way I have wanted for a long time- to establish this closeness with him-beyond the usual day.
Within moments I realized that this can be one expression of intimacy. It does not have to be sexual (although that is an aspect/expression of if). The interesting part was that as we opened up on a communication level I was more willing to be opened up on a sexual level as well (meaning approach him to engage sexually- than the other way around).
I want to live “intimacy” to its full potential of expression which means it is about building trust, opening up to myself/my husband/others, communicating and of course sexual expression with my husband.
Some ways to sound out intimacy:
-in-to-me-I-see (which is an often heard one)
-in-ti (which is “you” in Bulgarian)-I-see (into you I see)
-in-ti-messy (as in the mess inside)
Redefinition: Intimacy- communication and physical touch established/built through self trust, openness, closeness first with oneself and then expressed with another without expectation or obligation.